


Glass Bird

by aleria



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Implied/Referenced Underage Sex, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-08
Updated: 2017-08-08
Packaged: 2018-12-13 00:56:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 13
Words: 22,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11748756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aleria/pseuds/aleria
Summary: "This is why I never had children!"Ed gets mixed up in the bad business of hormone alchemy, which leaves him with a certain, unwanted impression of Colonel Mustang.





	1. Alchemy

**Author's Note:**

> Not sure where and when this takes place-- Ed still has his automail, and Roy is still a Colonel, but I bumped Ed's age to 17 so... Interpret that as you will!

Colonel Roy Mustang was a black storm as he marched down the lamp lit streets of the capital. Behind him his platoon followed with carefully even steps. Though they hid it well, the Colonel could tell they were fearful of his rage. He had begun the mission with an verbal explosion at the base and he did nothing to hide his temper now.

Some of his anger was aimed at his new sergeant, who was young and cocky, and who had neglected to relay important case information to his commanding officer. The rest of the Colonel's anger was aimed at himself, for being young and cocky and not properly researching the case before handing it off haphazardly to the youngest and most headstrong of the state alchemists. 

It had been a huge mistake. Not that the Colonel hadn't assigned difficult or dangerous missions to this particular alchemist before. In fact, Edward Elric and his brother Alphonse were the best alchemists that Roy Mustang had at his disposal, besides himself. This case, however, was not for them.

All Roy had to read in the case file was the name Dion Alstrad and he would be reminded of another case long ago, before the Ishvalan war. Back then Alstrad was a young man and inexperienced enough to get caught. He had escaped his confinement sometime in the last month and was recently discovered in Central. If it had been a matter of simply picking Alstrad up, the job would be done. But the case was marked for state alchemist intervention, meaning that Alstrad was practicing dangerous alchemy again. So, without reading the case file, Roy had sent Ed and Al into the den of that disgusting, filthy animal.

The building where Alstrad was known to be hiding was mostly occupied by a loud company house, whose patrons laughed and conversed in higher raised voices. A few heads on the second floor balcony turned from their drinks to watch the platoon of soldiers surround the building. The Colonel sent two men into the bar, where they would lock down the establishment until the bad business was done.

The Colonel made sure he was the first one to the basement door that led out to the alleyway. After only a moment’s hesitation, he turned to the remainder of the squad that prepared to follow him. It was only fair that he prepared them for what they might see here. God knows no one had warned him.

“Troops: Alstrad is a dangerous and grotesque alchemist,” Roy practically spat. Already images were rolling through his head that he wanted to block out. “He takes advantage of his victims and sexually abuses them. You will see the results of his experiments here. Ready yourself.” He had considered giving them an option to avoid following him into the den, but no one had ever given him a choice. Soldiers obey their commanding officer and he knew his men would follow him into anything.

Without another word the Colonel turned to the wooden door, aimed a finger, and blasted with a fireball of overkill. He didn’t wait for the flames to smoulder before marching down the stairs and into the fire-lit hallway.

The concrete basement must have once been used for storage, with several rooms leading off of one main hallway. Each one had a locked wooden door, and he signalled for the battering rams before marching onwards.

He only made it a few more steps before a door burst open and a man with arms full of papers and books paused just long enough to look like a rabbit about to be shot for dinner. And the Colonel shot. The blast of fire was aimed for the man’s chest, but it was all force and no burn. The man cried out once before the momentum smashed his head on the concrete floor behind him. He was unconscious before the burnt papers could gently fall around him. 

“These girls are tied up!” someone yelled behind the Colonel. He wasn’t surprised, but it made him feel no less sick to his stomach.

“Cut them all loose and take them to the infirmary,” he called out, and his voice was filled with rage. “And don’t listen to anything they say. Not until the doctors can look at them.” His hands were balled into tight fists and all the muscles from fingertip to shoulder were taut as a rope on a sail. His jaws ached from being clenched so firmly, but it was a sensation to be felt later. 

With another fiery blast that was far more forceful than necessary, he took out the closest door. He knew that the exploding wood could cause damage to the occupants, but he was too furious to care. Inside was two cots on either side of a wooden table, which covered in papers. While the papers had alchemy circles on them, the cots each held a person. On one side was a young woman and on another was a middle aged man.

He is experimenting with ages, Roy thought and he shuddered involuntarily. Each person was awake, but their eyes were half-lidded and their bodies slack, all but for the man whose genitals were obviously ridged under his khakis pants. Each person was shirtless, and on their stomachs, just under their pant line glowed alchemy symbols. 

“More in here,” the Colonel barked, and quick as a whip there were soldiers in the room, cutting at the binds that held each person prisoner to their cot. As they did so, moans escaped the parted mouths of the victims. Roy wanted to throw up. He turned away from the room and marched down the hall.

The man he had shot down was undoubtedly Alstrad. He had aged badly in jail, and the blast mark on his chest did him no favours. A medic was leaning over his body, a finger to his neck where a pulse could be checked. “He has a pulse,” the medic said in a methodical way. “He is unresponsive. Colonel, what are your orders?”

Choke the life out of him, Roy wanted to say. Smash his head into the cement over and over until his brains are all over the floor. “Take him to the barracks infirmary.” 

The Colonel couldn’t look at the man any longer, so he instead looked at the door to the room Alstrad had just vacated. His instincts told him this was where he would find Edward Elric, who had not returned with his brother after the first mission. Roy sensed the two soldiers coming behind him, waiting for instruction.

“Check the other rooms,” he ordered. “I will handle this one alone.”

The door was still intact and unlocked, and for that the Colonel was grateful. He had thought about how best to handle the situation if he found the Fullmetal Alchemist in the hands of Alstrad. Best case scenario, the boy would be detained but unhurt and unmolested. Worst case he would have found out first hand that Alstrad was not interested in the women he experimented on. 

The first time they caught Alstrad he had been keeping a young boy in his basement for weeks. The boy was dead when they finally discovered him, but there was evidence in the basement that hours before he had been some kind of a sex slave. The boy’s body had no signs of chronic abuse, except for a complicated alchemy circle that had been engraved into his stomach, just above his genitals.

Roy Mustang knew that the Fullmetal Alchemist was a proud, stubborn young man. To be caught in a situation that would have victimized him in such a way would destroy his ego and possibly traumatize him for the rest of his life. If he was going to be found like that poor boy years ago, it was imperative that as few people saw him as possible. If the Colonel was the only one to find out, Edward might be able to hang onto enough dignity to go on as a state alchemist.

So when the Colonel entered the room and indeed found Edward in the room, he closed the door behind him with a decisive snap.

A reading lamp illuminated messy papers on a desk in the middle of the small, windowless room. Several pages were scattered on the floor and some had been scribbled on to cross off the alchemist symbols written there.

There was a cot in this room, but it was empty. Instead the Fullmetal Alchemist was attached to the wall by chains-- obviously tying him to the bed hadn’t been measure enough. He hung limply and his chin rested on his bare chest. His pant line covered half of a glowing symbol: an alchemist circle.

“Fuck.” Edward Elric was only 17 and his idiot superior had subjected him to the worst kind of torture. Roy Mustang, so filled with anger and fire, suddenly felt hollow. He had completely ruined this kid for life. He could try to blame Alstrad, but ultimately the Colonel was responsible for keeping the Elric brothers from this kind of thing.

“No… fuck.” 

The Fullmetal Alchemist was saying something, and Roy started in surprise. “What?”

“I didn’t--” Edward paused to let out a small involuntary moan. “-- fuck.”

Roy realized his mouth was open and closed it quickly. He tried to maintain his military posture as he crossed the room to where Edward was trying to raise his head.

“Are you telling me he didn’t…” Roy paused as well, and after realizing how childish he was being, be went on. “Have you been raped?”

“Fuck no,” Edward all but spat, and now he looked right up into the Colonel’s face, and Roy could see it was flushed and conflicted. “But… I feel….” Even though the Colonel knew exactly what Edward was trying to say, he didn’t stop him from saying it. It was like watching a train wreck. “I feel funny.”

Edward shifted slightly, straining against the chains that held his metal hand away from his flesh one. He arched his back as if stretching, and as the low light played off his body Roy realized the alchemist was erect. An unmistakable lump pressed against his pants somewhere below the alchemy circle.

“Alstrad was experimenting with body chemistry,” the Colonel said quickly in explanation. He wanted to get the Fullmetal Alchemist out of this situation as soon as possible. The whole thing was exiting his comfort zone. “He was working with hormones. Against the patient’s will, obviously.”

Edward gave a half-hearted smirk and laughed gently out of his nose. “I don’t know what I want anymore.” He looked up into Roy’s eyes and the Colonel felt the awkwardness had reached the point that he couldn’t go past. 

The doctors at the base would have an alchemist on site that could deal with this sort of problem, but really, the circle on Edward’s body looked like it was drawn on with ink. It was superficial, and could easily be removed. Surely then the effects would lessen.

“I am going to try to remove the alchemy circle he drew on you,” the Colonel explained in his most military voice. “Hold still.” When the Fullmetal Alchemist didn’t move, Roy knelt down with a swath of first aid bandage in hand. He gingerly pushed the line of Edward’s pants down just enough to reveal the circle in it’s full. He ignored the the sharp intake of breath from above and began rubbing at the ink.

When Edward let out a loud moan, Roy jumped to his feet and backed away like he had stepped on a wasp nest. The alchemist was moving slowly, arching his back periodically and now biting his lower lip.

“S-sorry,” Edward muttered and Roy thought about saying the same but this was ridiculous! He couldn’t let one horny teen make him lose his nerve and be defeated. Besides, to call in the medical team would be to destroy the Fullmetal’s self esteem. No, he had to get it done quickly before the scene could escalate.

“Just shut up and let me do this,” he snapped and knelt down to get back to work. The next words that he heard he did everything in his power not to hear.

“I just… need it…” Edward was breathing. “So badly. Fuck. You gotta... help me.” At this Roy rubbed harder at the ink and saw that it was finally starting to smudge. There was one more unsettling groan from Edward before he was still and silent.

The Colonel stood up as straight as he could and waited for a response. He hoped to God it worked because he wasn’t about to ‘help’ the Fullmetal, at least not in the way he suspected her wanted. Not waiting any longer, he put his hands on the metal of the shackles detaining Edward and felt them melt under his heat. Before he was through, there was a smash as the Fullmetal freed his metal arm with force. Then his hands were together in his signature alchemy stance and the other shackle fell to the floor with a clatter.

Edward soundlessly stood up, even quicker and straighter than the Colonel had. But he wasn’t in the same condition as the Colonel and he stumbled when he did so. Still fighting the awkwardness of the whole situation, Roy did not catch him and Edward ended up on his hands and knees.

“FUCK that guy,” Edward finally burst. He struggled back to his feet again. “I will KILL him.” He clapped his hands together again and a blade shrieked out of his automail arm. He shoved the Colonel out of his way and literally kicked open the door. While the door gave out, Edward fell with it and both wood and boy fell in a heap in the hallway. 

“He’s already gone,” the Colonel yelled after him. He calmly followed his junior out of the doorway, stepping gingerly over his struggling body. Roy stopped to look down the hallway towards the exit, where people of various ages were being carried or escorted out of the building.

“If I was allowed to kill him, he would be dead already,” the Colonel said quietly, whether or not the Fullmetal Alchemist was listening. When he turned back to Edward, he found him sitting, staring at his hands which were balled into fists.

“I want a full report on my desk tomorrow morning,” the Colonel barked, which made Edward look up. Even in the dim light, Roy could make out the look of shame on Edward’s face. So he barrelled on with as little emotion as he could, like a true military man. “You will be debriefed after a visit to the infirmary. Then you can explain to me how a man who just got out of prison managed to defeat you and your brother and keep you detained for 24 hours.”

With a dramatic turn which alighted his coat, Colonel Roy Mustang left Fullmetal Alchemist Edward Elric to contemplate his punctured dignity, while the Colonel himself tried to make sense of what had just occurred.


	2. Cold Showers

Edward Elric had refused to let the doctors look at him and had fled the infirmary to the relative safety of his military apartment. He nearly collided with Alphonse on the stairway and had to grab the railing to catch himself. 

“Damnit, Al,” Ed cursed. “What the hell happened?” 

If Alphonse could have looked crestfallen, he would have. “What do you mean? What happened to you?” He grabbed his brother’s arms roughly and bent over to get a closer look at him. “Are you alright?”

Edward did what he could to shrug Al’s armored hands off of him. “I’m FINE. I had to be rescued by Colonel asshat and his band of useless soldiers. Where the hell were YOU?!” He was pointing accusingly at Alphonse, who continued to make a suit of armor look ashamed.

“I-I wasn’t allowed!” Al protested. “The Colonel wouldn’t let me come! He-- he said he would detain me and… and I wasn’t even sure where they found you!” All of these words were nothing to the tone of voice that echoed in Al’s body. Edward was already melting to his brother’s guilt and he shook his head angrily.

“It’s FINE. I know. That asshole had to have all the glory.” He was talking about the Colonel again. For whatever reason, he found himself blaming the entire episode on him. He wanted to throttle a lot of people right now, but the Colonel was at the top of the list. Just after Alstrad.

Alphonse was still watching him. “But what happened?”

There was a long pause and Ed didn’t look at his brother. Instead he looked down the stairs where he could see people coming and going in the front foyer. “I don’t really want to talk about it,” he grunted, and he silently prayed that this would be enough to shut Al up for a while. At least until Ed could make sense of it himself.

When he heard Al sigh, Edward knew he was free to have some alone time. He was deadly tired and needed a long shower to cleanse him of… everything. So without looking at Alphonse again, he trudged up the stairs and did all he could not to slam his door behind him.

The first thing he wanted to do, before thinking or sleeping or even eating, was to wash the horrible alchemy circle off of his stomach. It was a complicated one, with many tiny symbols and more lines than he ever had used himself. But far from wanting to research it closely, Edward just wanted it gone. The Colonel had managed to smudge it just enough to cancel its effects, but just having the thing there made his skin crawl.

Even after the last of the ink swirled down the drain, Ed stayed in the shower for a long time. It didn’t matter that Alstrad hadn’t raped him. Just seeing the look in that old man’s face was enough to make Ed feel sick. And the more he thought about it, the more he realized that it had only a matter of time-- hours, maybe-- before the man had gone too far. He should be grateful to the Colonel, not angry, for finding him in time.

But why the hell did it have to be the Colonel? That pompous asshole was probably marching around the base feeling so above the Fullmetal Alchemist, having seen him at his most vulnerable. He had not only seen Ed in that most pathetic state, but had heard him practically beg for… 

For…

For what? What was he going to ask for? For the Colonel to relieve Ed of his urges? For someone to fuck him, like Alstrad might have? For a hand job while his own hands were chained to the wall, completely at the mercy of someone pleasuring him until he… 

Fuck.

Edward opened his eyes in the shower and realized that his mind had wandered too far. He was back in that cell, bound by his wrists, sporting a raging hardon while someone jerked him off until he came. And… oh please no… that someone had been the Colonel.

And now he was hard and damned if he was going to jerk off to that image.

Edward cranked the cold water and grit his teeth as the icy water made him forget every other sensation in his body. He forced himself to stand under the merciless torrent until he was shaking from cold. But now the hardon was gone and that was all that mattered. 

Freezing and wet, Edward crawled into bed and thankfully he didn’t dream of anything at all.


	3. Reading Backwards

Roy Mustang had read the words “Policy 4.9.2 wherein the term “alchemist” refers to the party in cases only when bylaw 236 is not in effect.” five times before he realized that he really was distracted. He hadn’t realized when he sent two different privates to get him coffee. He also didn’t think much of his forgetting to shave. 

He told himself he was just exhausted from the night before. He hadn’t gone to sleep until he had finished all of his own paperwork and followed up on all arrests and witness reports. He was able to squeeze a few hours of nap on the couch in his office before he was ready for the next barrage of work. The Alstrad case had turned out to be connected to a prostitution ring that had to be dealt with immediately, as the perpetrators began to flee the moment word got out that Alstrad had been caught. Just about every unit under the Colonel’s command was now on the field cleaning up the mess as quickly as possible. They were still bringing in girls who were marked with Alstrad’s work. 

All of this was being done with the efficiency that the Colonel prided himself with. No one would say that he hadn’t handled everything carefully and quickly, with minimal casualties or escapes. He would be commended by his superiors, as usual.

And yet, his 9 o'clock meeting with the Elric brothers had him reading reports backwards. Roy knew that eventually the things he had seen would melt into the back of his skull like all of the things he wanted to forget. But this was too fresh in his mind, and he kept seeing golden eyes, half-lidded and filled with lust. How was he going to meet that gaze now and not fall into complete and agonizing awkwardness? 

He was being ridiculous again. Roy Mustang was not a child and should not worry about things like embarrassment or lust. He was a Colonel and Edward Elric’s superior officer.

“The Fullmetal Alchemist and his brother are here, sir,” Lieutenant Hawkeye announced and the Colonel jumped to his feet. Sharp as ever, Hawkeye raised an eyebrow at this behaviour, but said nothing.

“Let them in,” Roy said in what he hoped was his most neutral voice. He sat down just as quickly.

He was staring at the document again when he heard the telltale clangs and shuffles that meant the Elric brothers had entered. He looked up casually to see them saluting, and was actually glad to see how lazily and disrespectfully Fullmetal was doing it. His ego must have been still intact.

"Your report?"

Edward shifted in what seemed an uncomfortable way and his brother gave him a look that could mean anything. After a pause, Alphonse approached the desk with a handful of neatly stapled papers. At first Roy didn't know what he was being handed. The Elric brothers almost always delivered oral reports. He didn't even know that they had access to a typewriter.

He considered questioning this, but the answer was already written on Fullmetal's face. 

He might have lost a chunk of ego after all, thought the Colonel with a twinge of guilt. Ed was inspecting the carpet furiously. Rather than looking embarrassed, a black cloud seemed to hang over him. Alphonse made up for it by stuttering an excuse for why the report was typed. He seemed to also be apologizing for the spelling mistakes, but the Colonel wasn't listening. He was wondering whether the Fullmetal Alchemist was angry with him, or whether he was going to have to detain the boy to keep him from outright murdering Alstrad.

"So, basically, what I'm saying is," Alphonse was saying, "We will need to bill the department for the damages to the typewriter... If that's OK." 

In the awkward silence that followed, Roy unfolded the fingers he had steepled under his chin and looked at Al. "It's fine."

"... Really?" Alphonse looked from the Colonel to his brother as if they had made a small victory, but Ed remained unmoved. Clearly Al wasn't aware of the whole situation yet.

"Alphonse," the Colonel said as he rose from his desk. Roy got the impression that the suit of armor was petrified, but he went on. "I need to talk to Fullmetal briefly. Alone."

Alphonse paused in what must have been surprise. "Of course, sir." He offered the Colonel a much more appropriate salute than his brother before his clanging steps headed for the door. Edward looked up just in time to give his brother a bit of a reassuring nod before he left.

Roy hesitated, then walked around his desk and towards the other alchemist. The closer he got, the more anxious Edward seemed to become. Yes, there was definitely still some damage here. Finally they stood a few yards apart and Roy was close enough to see a flush creeping up Edward's neck. 

"You didn't stay for a medical examination," he observed. Apparently Ed had slipped away from the troops before even seeing a doctor. "I need to know of you are physically able to carry on your work."

"I'm fine," was Ed's predictable answer. He was as defiant as ever, but still avoided eye contact.

Roy felt a familiar wave of frustration that usually came in when he had to talk to the Fullmetal Alchemist. He was still just a stubborn teen after all. "I have all units working all hours on this prostitution case," Roy went on, and this time he let a bit of anger into his tone. "You are one of the only state a alchemists who isn't assigned, and I need you in top shape, ready to work." Ed was still frowning at the floor, but the Colonel knew he was listening. "If there is any reason at all that you are even remotely unwell--"

"Alright already!" Edward snapped, and his eyes blazed at his superior. "I'm not fine. What the hell do I do about it?" 

"What's the problem?" Roy countered, as calmly as he could in the face of the raging teen.

Ed looked like his mind had tripped on the last stair and he was fighting to maintain balance. Suddenly his cheeks were aflame and he wouldn't speak. Somehow he held eye contact, to the point where now Roy was starting to feel uncomfortable. All of these things spoke louder than words.

"I have a specialist who I have been consulting," Roy offered finally. He drew from his breast pocket a number of cards, and after sifting through them, he handed one to Ed. "She specialized in biology, and she's an alchemist."

Edward looked at the card like a shipwreck survivor coming upon a lifeboat. "I need to you in top shape, Fullmetal," Roy repeated for good measure before turning back to his desk.

When Edward was gone, the Colonel allowed himself a small sigh of relief. But after a moment's consideration, he realized he wasn't relieved at all.


	4. Lania Fitzgibbons

It took the Fullmetal Alchemist nearly a week to work up the courage to visit the ‘specialist’. By then things were starting to become drastic and only desperation would convince him to admit these problems to another human being. 

However, Lania Fitzgibbons looked like the last person in the world that Edward Elric wanted to explain his problems to. She was a tall, slightly overweight middle-aged woman with a large bosom and very red lips. Her red hair dye needed a touch-up, as dark roots stood stark against her otherwise pale complexion. She answered the door of her duplex house with an unwelcoming frown and one hand on her generous hip.

“Uhm… Lania Fitzgibbons?” Ed ventured, feeling very small on the woman’s front step. The red and purple geraniums that surrounded him in pots clashed horribly with the pink siding of the house. Behind him the sounds of a busy street continued even into the evening.

The woman narrowed her eyes, which looked twice as big for how much makeup she wore. “Yes,” she said in a hesitant voice. Her posture made Ed think of the military, while her floral dress made him think of a sweet old lady.

“I-- I was recommended… refered, actually, by Colonel Roy Mustang?” Ed wondered if the Colonel had possibly called ahead, but judging by the woman’s suspicious gaze, he was likely out of luck. 

“I am up to my ears in work already,” the woman huffed, and Ed was surprised she didn’t actually slam the door in his face right then. “The Colonel needs to realize I am only one woman.” There was something in the way she said ‘colonel’ that made Ed wonder if she didn’t like the man. It was a theory that he could work with.

“Yeah, well, he’s sort of an asshole when it comes to human relations,” Ed said casually. It was a risk, insulting his superior in front of anyone other than his brother. But he had a hunch the woman was on the same page as him.

To his relief, the woman threw back her head and let out a barking laugh. “You are telling me!” she guffawed and patted Ed on the shoulder with a more strength than he was expecting. He wondered if she was at all related to the Armstrongs. 

“He ordered you to come to me then, eh?” she ventured, and stepped backwards to reveal a hallway that seemed to be painted green. When Edward took a tentative step in, he realized that plants lined the walls between doorways. They were illuminated by the setting sun, which beamed in through a large window at the end of the hall.

Lania Fitzgibbons shut the door and walked with decisive strides towards the doorway at the end of the hall. It did not have a door and led into a large kitchen. At least, Ed assumed it was a kitchen because there was a sink. Every other surface in the room was covered in pots. Some of them were filled with plants, others stacked neatly. On the table in the middle was a magnifying glass attached to a light that illuminated a giant leaf with an alchemy symbol drawn on.

“I don’t have guests often,” Lania was saying as she let Ed take in the scene. “Especially not since the Colonel dumped all of this work on me.” She opened a cupboard that had very little inside except a few plates and cups, arranged in a perfectly orderly fashion. She extracted cups and put a copper kettle on the stove.

When she indicated a wooden chair, Ed sat down tentatively. “You’re a state alchemist?” he asked after a moment.

“Yeah,” she muttered, and drew a cigarette out of the breast pocket of her floral dress. “But don’t think I’m not questioning that decision every day of my life.” She clamped the cigarette between her red lips and lit a match on a small flower matchbook. She sat across the table with a grateful sigh and surveyed Ed over the tops of wide-leaved plants. 

Ed found it hard to hold eye-contact and instead watched the curl of smoke rise lazily over the woman’s head. He tried to think of where he was going to start, but the look on Lania’s face suggested she was preparing her own speech, so he waited in awkward silence.

“You’re a little young to be in the military,” she started, as if she had been trying to work out why Ed was there before he could tell her. “Unless you are stunted. I know a little about growth hormones, you know.”

Ed felt the familiar twinge of annoyance at someone suggesting he was ‘stunted’. He managed to bite his tongue but couldn’t stop the glare from piercing the gap between the two of them. The curl of smile in the corner of Lania’s mouth suggested that she recognized his annoyance.

“I’m a state alchemist, too,” Ed managed to say, unable to keep the gruffness out of his tone. He leaned back in the wooden chair, which creaked, and crossed his arms. “I’m 17.”

“Ah,” Lania exclaimed loudly, which made Ed start. She had the voice of an opera singer, or perhaps a drill sergeant. “The Fullmetal Alchemist, is it? Edward Elric. Pleasure to meet you, my boy!” She extended a hand with bright purple nails that Ed took almost reluctantly. Her grasp was firm and she shook once. “I’ve heard of you. Youngest State Alchemist, they say. Still short for your age, though.” She barked another laugh.

Edward stood up so quickly the table shuttered. If there was anything that made him snap it was jabs at his size. This time he didn’t hide any of his fuming. “Well you aren’t exactly the size of a -a dainty woman yourself,” he shot, stumbling over his words in his anger. 

This only made Lania laugh, and she threw her head back again like a wolf howling to the moon. Then she stood, chuckling as she knocked ash off the end of her cigarette. “Oh, I could lose a few pounds,” she laughed, going to the stove top where the kettle was steaming. “And maybe a few inches. But damned if I’ll let it get to me like you do.” She roared another laugh as she spilled the hot water she tried to pour. She continued to dole out tea while chuckling about ‘dainty women’. 

Ed didn’t sit down when the teacup was put in front of him amongst pots and tools. Lania made herself comfortable again and took a deep draw from her cigarette. “Nevermind, kid,” she went on with a breath of smoke. “It’s all hormones. You’ll grow like any other boy. Just wait.” 

There was something in her careless tone that made some of Edward’s anger ease out of him. He usually expected other reactions to his temper: apologies, surprise or returned anger. He started to wonder if maybe this woman was the right person to talk to.

After a moment, Lania waved her hand at Ed. “Come on, stop standing there like a fool and tell me why you’re here.” 

Ed sat down with as little awkwardness as he could muster, and tentatively picked up the tea cup. “You work with human chemistry?” he asked, and he let his gaze move over all the plants and gardening tools in the room. 

“I do,” Lania admitted, blowing on her own cup of tea. “But you don’t expect me to pile bodies up all over the room, do you?” She barked a laugh at her own joke and went on. “My biology work spans over plants and animals. But I know where my moral lines are drawn.” Her voice was serious now, and Ed found it frightening how quickly she could change pace. She paused and drew another long drag from her cigarette, which was nearly finished now. After letting out a breath, she looked straight at Ed. “I worked with Dion Alstrad.”

Edward felt the bottom of his stomach fall sharply, as if it had been sacrificed for the Truth. Suddenly his heart was in his throat, threatening to choke him. Lania must not have noticed, because she continued to explain.

“Decades ago, when we were both young researchers. When you’re young and intelligent, your thirst for knowledge is unquenchable, but I don’t need to explain that to you. Not knowing is never enough, and Alstrad and I shared a passion for the complex and ever-changing world of chemical biology. But we went our separate ways eventually, long before he was arrested.” She paused only to light a new cigarette.

Ed was enthralled and disgusted. He wasn’t sure if he would be able to interrupt Lania if he wanted to. The shock of thinking that this woman might have shared research with that monster was overwhelming.

“I had no idea he meant to experiment on humans,” she went on. “We never went beyond mice. And eventually I turned to botany on my own and the thought of animal chemistry went out of my head.” She stopped suddenly when she caught sight of Ed. 

He wasn’t standing, but he was shock-still and board-stiff in his seat. He felt sick to his stomach and light-headed, like all the blood was draining into that hole in his gut. He never broke eye contact with Lania, though he wasn’t really looking at her at all.

“Elric?” he asked, putting down her cup and leaning closer to the table. “Are you alright?”

Of course I am, Ed was thinking on the surface. After all, he was healthy, unhurt and alive. He wasn’t hungry or tired. He had a home and a brother and there were no looming disasters to speak of. He had a goal in life and means to find the things he sought. 

But underneath that was something he couldn’t describe. It was not like any feeling he was used to having. It made him want to fall into himself and roll into a tight little ball. It wasn’t quite fear, but he was frightened. It wasn’t quite anger, but he was furious. Above all, he felt there was no where he would ever feel safe again.

“Alstrad,” he mouthed, and it was an effort to unclench his jaw to say even this. He could feel heat rising up his neck and crowding his head. In the end, anger always won over any other emotion.

Lania leaned back again, looking much less sure of herself. “You have met him?” She ignored the lit cigarette in her fingers and let the smoke linger around her. She was watching Ed apprehensively.

Ed nodded and forced himself to pick up the cup of tea. He took a long drink before looking back at Lania with all the focus he could muster. “I met him a week ago. Before he was arrested again.”

It didn’t seem to take any more than this for the woman to understand the whole story. Working for Roy Mustang, she must have been briefed about everything that had happened after Alstrad’s escape. The only thing omitted would have been the names of the victims. She slowly raised the cigarette to her mouth while she put two and two together.

“I’m sorry,” she said in an uncharacteristically gentle voice. She shifted in her seat, no doubt gathering her thoughts. “This is why you are here, isn’t it?”

Ed made himself swallow to wet his dry throat. There was no beating around the bush now, and he would have to explain himself to Lania. But where was he going to start? She was watching him with a look which could only be interpreted as concern. 

“He didn’t rape me,” he blurted. He immediately felt the heat rise in his cheeks and lowered his gaze to the plants on the table. When Lania didn’t say anything, he was forced to go on and explain himself. “I mean, I was used for-- for the experiments. I don’t really… understand it myself.” 

Lania was letting out a long breath and Ed could see it was all smoke. He stifled a cough which made the woman stand up and open a window. When she sat down, she opened her mouth for a moment before speaking.

“Alstrad worked with hormones,” she began. “He was an expert at manipulating them in animals, and by the time he was first arrested he had mastered using them on humans too. It’s amazing how much you can manipulate a person by controlling their body chemistry.” She paused. “But I imagine you understand that more than me.” She didn’t wait for Ed to confirm or deny, and went on. “It’s a line that I would never have crossed, and I am sickened to think that I once shared his joy for research. If I had known how his passions would twist, I would have done something, maybe.” Her voice seemed to trail off and she ended with a drag on her cigarette.

“Are there any side-effects?” Ed said in a tone that he tried hard to keep even. There was no use dragging the questions out any more than necessary. He was already uncomfortable, embarrassed and furious with no one in particular. All he wanted were answers.

“Side effects?” Lania echoed, and Ed was afraid he was going to have to go into detail. To his horror, she did not fill in the blanks herself. It was only after chugging the rest of his tea that Ed had the courage to keep talking.

“I feel… weird,” he began. Immediately he knew this was not helpful in the least, but going into more detail was going to be hard on his ego. It would take some time to get it out. “Like the effects are not gone.” It was the best he could do for now.

The woman frowned like she was thinking, then stood up. “Show me where your alchemy symbol was.” 

“What?!” Ed yelped, feeling his face burn again. 

“Come on,” Lania went on, stubbing out her cigarette and motioning for Ed to stand up. “You can be squeamish, or we can figure out your problem.” She all but pulled Ed to his feet and helped him (or rather forced him) to take off his red coat. The next thing to go was his shirt, although much more reluctantly. When Ed awkwardly indicated the spot on his lower torso, Lania went on to push down the waist of his pants, making him squawk in protest. She ignored him.

“I don’t see anything residual,” she said in a business-like voice. She put her big hand on the spot where the circle had been drawn and closed her eyes. “No, nothing I can work with. It seems to be wiped completely off.” 

Ed leapt back and pulled down his shirt in defense. “It damn well better be,” he said grumpily. “I only washed it 500 times.” He pulled his coat back on for good measure and retreated to the relative safety of his chair. Lania stood over him with one hand on his hip and another running through her badly dyed hair. She was thinking. 

“What effects are you still experiencing?” she pressed and she ran her eyes up and down Ed’s body in a way that made him uncomfortable. 

He hunched over, pulling his coat closed with a frown. “The… the weird ones.” 

Now Lania frowned and Ed knew he was still not being helpful again. He wondered if maybe it was better for him to just give up and sort it out himself. 

“You’re still horny?” she asked before Ed could make up his mind. “How horny? On a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being how you felt with the circle still active.”

Edward wondered if it was possible to pass out from embarrassment, because he felt his vision blur for a moment as the heat in his face reached a peak. 

“Well?” Lania pushed, not at all patiently.

“A -- a …” stuttered Ed. “I, I think…” Not for the first time, he thought back to when he was chained to the wall, hardon raging and the Colonel crouched over him. A flutter of feeling responded in his groin which he tried to ignore. “Maybe… 8? Or- or 9?”

Lania didn’t look surprised in the least and instead walked back around to her chair where she sat and lit another cigarette. After a moment, she asked, “How old did you say you were?”

Ed blinked, not expecting this question. “17.” 

Lania nodded slowly, and then again. Smoke slowly seeped out of her nose. “I have done research on human hormones. Even more now that Mustang has me working this case. And if there is one category of people impossible to use as a control, it is young men and women.” She sighed heavily. “I don’t even know why hormone alchemy is necessary on them, if you ask me. It barely takes a nudge to send them down that path. No wonder they were the targets, that and his tastes…” Lania looked quickly at Ed, who tried not to meet her gaze. “Anyway, the point I’m trying to make, is I am not sure you are experiencing any side effects, Elric.”

Ed opened his mouth in protest, but didn’t have the words ready.

“Tell me, boy,” she went on. “When you are horny, is it towards anyone at all? Do you really feel that unquenchable thirst that went along with the alchemy circle? Or is it fleeting, and focused only on those you are attracted to?”

Ed’s mouth was still opened and he quickly scrounged for the words he needed to fill it, even if they were just “Yes, no, I mean… on those… who. Yeah.”

Lania was leaning back like she had already solved the problem. “I never had kids, you know. I couldn’t deal with this stuff. Teenagers, really!” She continued to smoke with her eyes half closed as if bored. 

“But, that can’t be it,” Ed protested. He wasn’t about to sit back and accept that everything was fine. “It’s--- it’s making it hard to do alchemy. I can’t sleep as well, either. This isn’t normal.” He was started to feel frustrated again, especially since his mind kept wandering to the scene with the chains and the Colonel. 

Lania sighed and leaned on the table again. “Listen, all I can give you is the advice that I would give my young self: And that is to just let it out. Don’t bottle it up for years. Do you have a girlfriend?”

Edward shook his head hastily as his face flushed again. 

“How about a hand? Surely I don’t have to tell you what to do with that.”

Flushing even warmer than before, Ed looked down. “I already-- I mean, I know how to… You know.”

“Then continue to do.. ‘You Know’ and this will all pass eventually. That or just do find yourself a girlfriend. It will help, trust me.” Lania was seeming to be less and less amused by the whole conversation, which had moved away from alchemy and into the realm of a therapy session.

“Then I should… have s--” Ed swallowed, finding it hard to say the words. “Have sex?”

“Of course,” Lania boomed, seemingly happy that Ed had finally come to the logical conclusion. “You’re 17 already and still a virgin. Don’t lie, I can tell.” She had seen Ed’s mouth drop open again and cut off any protest. “You’re not an ugly kid. Go to whatever social gathering you kids like to do these days and find a date. Chances are there is already someone you like. Go ask her out and maybe she’ll want the same thing you do.”

“I seriously doubt that,” Edward said before he could catch himself. He clamped his mouth shut like it had betrayed him and snuck a look at Lania. She had raised a penciled eyebrow in scepticism. How the hell was he supposed to explain that the image that kept popping up in his head whenever he was horny was not only male, not only his superior, but also the person that liked him least in the world?


	5. Madman

Dion Alstrad was the ugliest man Roy Mustang had ever laid eyes on. And this wasn’t just because his face sagged like an elephant from age and fatigue, or because his white hair was thinning to show a scarred scalp. His cheeks were hollow and his eyes, though closed, seemed sunken as well. As his chest rose and fell in sleep his breaths came out in annoying wheezes and whistles.

He was ugly because of what Roy knew about him. He was a monster without remorse. He was sick and misguided. He preyed on the helpless, not out of anger or greed, but out of the pure pleasure of control and sex. 

He looked so old and helpless lying on that hospital bed. It would be so easy for Roy to reach down and smother him in his sleep. He wouldn’t even need to use a pillow: he could just plug his nose and cover his mouth and avoid whatever feeble struggles the man put up.

But the soldiers at the door were under strict orders not to let any harm come to this man. Roy had given the orders himself, and he was so firm with them that he hoped they would even stop the King himself. 

Like with the many criminals that fell under the military’s jurisdiction he was going on trial, but not before he was pumped for any information he could give them. The only problem was that Dion Alstrad was, as far as any of the psychologists could tell, out of his mind. Roy wasn’t sure if he had always been mad, or if he worsened with age, or if he had hit his head badly during his arrest. The latter Roy had no regrets about: he might have killed the man and still been within his rights.

However, this meant that Alstrad’s many contacts within the prostitution rings would forever be locked into his sick mind. They had been able to gather most of the information from Alstrad’s home and laboratory, but there was always more. They found evidence that he had been shipping people, essentially slaves, to the cardinal cities. They needed a lead-- any lead-- that could help them crack the rings in those cities. 

Roy had been down to see Alstrad three times before now, and each time they only got ramblings and repetitions from the man. Often he would forget where he was or who he was talking to. Other times he would become so violent that he had to be restrained and eventually sedated.

But this morning a report had come in that Alstrad was lucid enough to carry conversations, and that was enough for Roy to try again.

When Alstrad started to stir, Roy clenched his fists where they rested on his crossed knee. The man’s eyes were a pale green, slightly milky but ever seeing. They travelled over the room until the fell upon the Colonel where he sat beside the bed. Alstrad was restrained, but he made no move to react to the Colonel’s presence, except to smile.

“Back again?” he wheezed, flashing a too-wide smile of yellowing teeth. 

Roy’s jaw clenched in response. He had to admit he was surprised that Alstrad remembered his previous visits. He assumed the man was out of his mind the whole time.

“You’re the Colonel,” Alstrad went on, trying to sit up on his pillows and failing. He laid back down, but kept his eyes on Roy. “The Colonel Mustang, who shoots at old frail men and gives them concussions.”

Roy did not let himself voice the comebacks that were on the tip of his tongue. He waited, letting the man talk for as long as he needed to. If he waited long enough, he might get the information he wanted without having to actually converse with this monster.

“Luckily they fixed me up nice,” Alstrad drawled on, pausing only to catch his wheezing breath. “Those nice soldiers and nurses. Treated nicely here, I am.” He looked around the room, as if expecting a nurse to arrive with something to eat.

“No one is coming,” Roy said with a calm and even voice. “Just me and you, Alstrad.”

Alstrad feigned a look of surprise and stopped looking around. “Just me and Colonel Mustang. How lucky. I hear he is an all important member of the military. He will give me such a fair trial, I bet.”

“Everyone is entitled to a fair trial,” Roy said, knowing how much he was lying, but this man didn’t deserve the truth. The truth was so many things the military did had the smell of corruption, but they didn’t need to botch Alstrad’s trial to convict him. He was already due 5 more years in jail, but his most recent escape could land a life sentence in a maximum security facility. Roy couldn’t imagine what the man hoped to get out of a ‘fair trial’.

“Who will come to see me on trial?” the man was going on. “Will all my subjects come? The ones who you found, anyway. I want to see them again, so much.” Roy grimaced. Of course the victims would want to see Alstrad brought to justice, and he wondered if that was all he wanted out of his trial: to taunt his victims one more time.

“You could see them all if you told us where they all were,” the Colonel offered. He knew that a man out of his mind was more likely to react well to honey. So Roy would swallow his rage and be the nice soldier.

Alstrad laughed a laugh that sounded like his throat was coated with sand. “That’s no fun, Colonel,” he said in a voice that was too full of energy for his age. “You have to FIND them. Where are they? Where are they?” He rattled his head at the Colonel, as if playing with a small child. Roy frowned.

“We have found of your accomplices,” he lied. “It’s only a matter of time before the victims are all found.”

“They’ll be dead, most likely,” Alstrad said, turning his head to look at the ceiling. “Mmmm except my boys. I hate killing them. It’s such a messy business.” He grimaced as if the ceiling was covered with mould, and then closed his eyes. “Who was that last one? Andrew? Or… Mmmm…”

Roy felt his head start to cloud with anger, and though he knew he should control himself, all he could see was Astrad smiling at the memory of one of his ‘boys’. He ground his teeth, willing himself not to snap. There were soldiers just outside the door, ready to call in another interrogator. But pride kept Roy Mustang in place while his mind buzzed with rage.

“Edward! His name was Edward… Oh…!” 

Roy suddenly felt himself get on his feet. He stopped himself before he did something he would regret. He told himself he was overreacting. He just heard a familiar name and it made him snap. He forced himself to sit down again.

“I don’t care what their names are, so long as we find them,” Roy spat, unable to keep the emotion from his voice.

But Alstrad looked like the Colonel had handed him a birthday cake. His eyes were alight and his mouth in an open smile. “Ahh!” he cried. “Edward, you know him? My sweet Edward.” He was talking faster now, spurred on by excitement. “You know he really was the prettiest, that long blonde hair. I was going to keep him for myself. No one would touch him but when I did, mmmm, he would ask for it. And I would give him everything he wanted, I would--”

Roy barely uttered a grunt as his fist connected with Alstrad’s face. The slap of skin on skin was muted only by the pillow that soften the blow. But after the first hit, he knew he had at least broken the man’s nose. The second blow was on his cheek bone and served only to make him cry out. By the fifth or sixth blow the soldiers had come in and grabbed the Colonel by the arms. Roy only struggled enough for them to release him. When they did he stood them for a moment, panting from the effort. He watched Alstrad, who was blinking in surprise as blood seeped from his nose. 

“Send for Lieutenant Hawkeye,” Roy mustered to the two privates. “She’ll finish up here.”

And then he fled as quickly as dignity would allow.


	6. Rubble

Edward watched the dust slowly settle around him while a string of swear words repeated themselves in his mind.

fuckshitdamnballscuntshitcrapdamnfuckdamndamndamn

Alphonse stood uselessly by Ed’s side, watching as well, but not likely swearing quite so much. Every so often Alphonse would look over at Ed and then sigh, but the Fullmetal Alchemist was not ready to offer an explanation to anyone. 

The house in front of them was completely totalled. It was empty, of course, and it was supposed to be totalled. In fact, that was the job that they had taken on for the afternoon: demolishing select buildings. The problem was the 5 or 6 other buildings that were also completely destroyed. These were also empty, but the owners were under the assumption that they would be able to return as soon as construction was finished. 

And this wasn’t even the first time. The very first job Ed had managed to miss the house entirely and destroy the adjacent flower shop. They had to spend an extra two hours rebuilding the building, a job which fell completely on Al, since every time Ed tried to recreate the stone work he just ended up flinging chunks of rock in every direction.

The sun was setting, and the extra buildings were going to take at least an hour each to reconstruct. The brothers were likely to be there until midnight, and that was only if Ed could get his alchemy under control. And although Al was completely willing to stay (he didn’t sleep anyway) his brother was too stubborn to leave him alone. Both the Elrics knew these stakes, and so Al continued to sigh and Ed continued to mentally swear.

As if on cue, they turned their heads to the sound of a car approaching on the empty street. The area was off-limits to anyone but those involved in the project. There was no questioning who was in the car.

“Fuck shit DAMNIT,” Edward finally said out loud as he kicked a large stone, making his automail foot clang loudly and the stone turn over stubbornly.

Colonel Roy Mustang got out of his car and made no move to hide his alarm. “What,” he began, “the HELL happened here, Elric!?” He looked straight at Edward, as if it was all his fault (which it was, but he Colonel didn’t know this!). He marched closer to the wreckage, waving a hand idly in front of his face to clear some of the dust. “One house,” he went on. “You only had to take down ONE.” He rounded on Edward and Alphonse again.

Ed couldn’t look even meet his eye. Normally in this situation he would be defiant and dismissive, offering excuses that were all out of his control. He would have some snappy comebacks and probably even manage to insult the Colonel in the process. But Ed’s attitude was in as much shambles as his alchemy. He felt like a rug that was starting to fray at the edges, and soon he would only be a pile of wool. 

“We-- we can fix it!” Alphonse said when Edward wouldn’t speak. “We promise, right brother? We’ll clean it all up. We’ll stay until it’s done.”

“No,” the Colonel boomed, and it made Ed finally look up. Roy Mustang looked angry, but not as furious as he should have been. Instead he looked almost as tired as Ed felt. “We’ll send in someone else. Go home and stop destroying the city.”

“We’ll fix it,” Ed insisted, finding his voice. He met the Colonel’s gaze and he tried to focus on a familiar feeling of defiance that seemed to be buried under so many other things.

“No, you won’t,” the Colonel barked. “You didn’t before. You won’t now. You aren’t ABLE to fix it. Go home and let a capable alchemist finish the job.”

“Say that again,” Ed spat back, feeling almost like his old self again. He even took a step towards his superior, showing that he was not about to back down.

“Alphonse,” the Colonel barked, which made Al stand up straight. “I need to talk to you brother. When I am done I am giving you an order to take him home, whether he wants to or not.” 

“Y-yes sir,” Al said weakly. Ed did not turn to see him, but heard his clanging footsteps retreat to a safe distance on the other side of the car. He wasn’t sure why, but it made him nervous to think that the Colonel had to talk to him personally. Was he about to get fired?

“I said,” the Colonel began through gritted teeth, “I need you in top shape.” He did not break his dagger-gaze with the shorter alchemist, and out of sheer determination and defiance, Ed held that gaze.

“I’m fi--”

“Don’t lie to me, Elric,” the Colonel snapped and Ed almost winced. He knew when he pushed the Colonel too far, and he was getting dangerously close to that line. But the more Roy Mustang snapped at him, the more he wanted to retaliate.

“It’s out of my control!” Ed said, throwing his hands in the air. “I went to your stupid specialist. I tried everything she suggested!” Well, almost everything.

“Lania Fitzgibbons is not stupid,” the Colonel spat. “There is no one more able in the city to deal with this problem. Unless it is not a problem and you are just a useless alchemist.”

“I am not…” Ed growled, but he was just rising to the bait. “It’s not permanent. I just need to wait. It-- it will pass. She said that, not me.”

“What will pass?” the Colonel demanded. He crossed his arms over his chest, looking angrily down in a way that made Ed hate that they weren’t the same height. 

“None of your business,” Ed muttered, letting his gaze fall to the rubble-strewn ground. He had been up all night, because whenever he fell asleep he dreamed wet, hot things that made him wake up panting. If not that, then it was nightmares of doors of Truth filled with old, grasping hands that wanted to caress him. He shuddered whenever he remembered those dreams, and cringed whenever he remembered the former.

“If you are going to be doing this,” the Colonel yelled as he flung his arms out to indicate the disaster behind him, “then it is my business! Stop being a child, Fullmetal, and tell me what the problem is. Lania told me that she gave you the best advice she could give, and judging by the state of things, you are blatantly ignoring her wisdom. She has been a state alchemist for decades longer than you, and you would do well to listen to your elders. It’s not enough for you to wave my orders, those of your direct superior. What would you do if the King came here right now, would you spit in his face as well?”

“Don’t exaggerate,” Ed managed to cut in. “Just because I won’t follow the crazy bullshit of one old alchemist, doesn’t mean I can’t take good advice.” He was almost yelling now too, and he could feel the pressure of anger pushing on his temples. 

“You’re too young to know good advice if slapped you in the face,” the Colonel countered. “You’re just a stubborn teen who I regret having under my command every day of this damned life.”

“Well then let me go, and I’ll go fuck up someone else’s life,” Ed shouted back, fury burning his cheeks. Did the Colonel really regret having to work with Ed? He knew the man didn’t like him, but Ed always considered himself fairly talented and useful.

“Not until you tell me whatever the hell you aren’t telling me,” the Colonel went on. “What did Lania tell you to do? What could possibly make you so goddamn stubborn?”

“Get stuffed!”

“You will tell me, or I swear I let a weeks worth of frustration out on you right now.” The Colonel was way passed the line of fury now, and Edward knew they were not going to ever come back from this.

“I’m not afraid of you, Mustang.”

“Then, I will tell Alphonse about everything that happened to you.” 

Silence fell after this statement and Edward struggled for something to say. He had done it-- Roy Mustang had finally threatened to hold Ed’s vulnerability over his head. He had been afraid of this moment ever since it had been the Colonel that had found him chained to that wall. He knew that the bastard would find a way to twist it against him. Ed looked over his shoulder to where his brother stood anxiously just out of shouting distance.

“You wouldn’t,” Ed said, but all of the energy was gone from his tone. He dared to look up into Roy’s eyes. But rather than looking triumphant, the Colonel looked uncomfortable and grim, like a man about to execute a convicted friend.

“What did Lania tell you to do?” When Ed dropped his gaze and didn’t answer, the Colonel barked “Tell me!”

It was too much for Edward. He looked up again with a snarl on his face. “She told me to FUCK you, OK?!” 

Shit. SHIT.

As soon as he said it he was filled with so, so much regret. He clamped his good hand over his mouth in shock, feeling his whole face-- his whole body-- turn the most violent shade of red. Without another word, he turned away and stumbled towards his brother. Alphonse caught him and held him steady on his feet.

“What happened?” Alphonse asked. “You look like you were shouting.” 

But Ed didn’t answer. He turned in the direction of their apartments and did not stop walking until he was in his room. There he crawled in his bed, shut his eyes, and pretended today had just been a bad dream.


	7. Morals

Things were getting completely out of hand. The office was running smoothly: the Alstrad case was being handled by the ever efficient and professional Lieutenant Hawkeye and agents were being dispatched to the other cities involved. Colonel Roy Mustang had handed a report to his superiors and a public press release had been issued. The worst of it was over.

Things were getting completely, utterly out of hand with Edward Elric.

Roy Mustang considered himself professional and appropriate. He was a model soldier and a man who would someday be at the top of the pyramid. He wasn’t known to do anything that could ruin his career.

But this business with the Fullmetal Alchemist had gone on for far too long. Roy had hoped that talking to Lania Fitzgibbons would solve Edward Elric of whatever hormonal side effects his run-in with Alstrad might have produced. But after talking with Lania himself, Roy learned it wasn’t so simple.

“There are no residual effects,” she insisted that morning in a meeting with the Colonel. “The kid is fine. He’s just going through a spot of difficulty. There’s someone he likes and it’s driving him crazy. You know how it was.”

Roy Mustang wasn’t sure he ever remembers a crush causing him to mess up his alchemy, but he supposed such a thing was possible. 

“And the poor kid only has a younger brother for family. No parent has ever explained this stuff to him. He barely understands what hormones are.”

Roy had agreed with that statement. Edward and Alphonse Elric were two teens with no tether, expected to navigate life on their own. Who were they supposed to consult on matters like sex or puberty?

What she had said next, however, made the situation look even worse.

“My advice to him was simple. Get the girl. Go on a date. The way things normally progress, he would finally get to have sex and release some of his built-up tension. A nice, natural way, if you ask me.”

Roy didn’t tell Lania that the person Edward had in mind was not some nice young girl. The fixation was likely a result of the Colonel finding Ed in his aroused state. He must have made an impression on him, to the disdain of everyone involved. Roy was sure that even Ed hated the situation, and that he didn’t really WANT to feel these emotions at all. Like an unwanted itch that had to be scratched.

And what did Roy want? That was a question he never, ever wanted to even begin to answer. He filed it away in his brain under ‘DO NOT OPEN’ and made a mental note to call on Laci later that week. Edward wasn’t the only one who needed to release some tension every once in awhile.

This still left the problem of curing the Fullmetal of his incurable arousal. It was clear that he was not going to be a ‘Dog of the Military’ in his current state. Could he file for disability and go on leave? Roy wondered how normal boys dealt with such problems-- but, of course, normal boys didn’t work for the military. They went to school and had part time jobs and experimented with their girlfriends. The Colonel recalled that there was a girl in Edward’s life, but so far as he knew she had left home and her current whereabouts were only known by the Elric brothers. He supposed that if Edward got it into his head to seek her for attention, he would take it upon himself to make the trip. Edward Elric, however, only had one person in his head.

Solving this matter would be the easiest thing in the world had the problem been for an older, female alchemist of preferably equal ranking to the Colonel. Indeed, Roy had been with many women who, although not with the military, held enough social rank that he never felt like he was abusing his power by being with them. Relieving a woman like that of sexual tension was as simple as buying a bouquet of flowers. 

Edward didn’t seem like a bouquet kind of person. 

He seemed more like a thrown-on-the-desk-and-fucked-silly kind of person.

When Hawkeye came to bring Colonel Mustang a new report from the East, she found him face buried in his gloved hands, shoulder hunched, coffee cold and forgotten. She might have heard him even groan in dismay. It wasn’t often that anyone caught him in this mood. Even Hawkeye rarely caught a glimpse of her superior when he was tied in knots this badly.

“I know that look,” she said matter-of-factly. She replaced the cold coffee with the report, making the Colonel look up. He glared at Hawkeye, annoyed at how easily she saw through him. He hoped she didn’t know nearly as much as she always knew.

“Moral struggle, right?” She didn’t sit down, but the slight quirk of her eyebrows and twitch of her lips suggested she was relaxed. She was speaking to the Colonel now as a friend, and not a subordinate. “You have to do something that goes against your values.”

Roy let out a breath that wasn’t quite a sigh. “What do I do?” he asked, looking past Riza to the door. He steepled his fingers like he always did when he was thinking hard. He had done little else than thinking hard since Lania left his office. 

Riza didn’t answer right away, but put on her own thinking face. She studied the Colonel’s expression, as if reading his mind. It made him uncomfortable and forced him to keep his gaze elsewhere. When she spoke, he knew it wasn’t going to be what he wanted to hear.

“If there are no other options, you have to do it,” she started. “It will not be the first time you have had to move your values aside. Sometimes you have to sacrifice your morals to get ahead in this world. However,” She took a breath as she paused. “Don’t do it lightly. Don’t ever forget that what you are doing is against your moral judgement. Always keep that knowledge with you.”

Roy finally looked at Hawkeye. She was so damn serious. “I’m not going to murder someone,” he said, cracking a grin. He couldn’t help it.

Riza rolled her eyes, breaking the mood and turning halfway to the door. “Then stop being such a flake and do the damn thing.” She let out an impatient noise before heading to the door. 

“Hawkeye,” the Colonel interrupted, before the Lieutenant could leave. “If you see Edward Elric, send him to me.”


	8. Rabbit Hole

Ed all but ran down the busy street. There was a street festival going on and there were vendors and people everywhere. It was impossible to move as quickly as he liked, but he was damned if he didn’t try. Every once in awhile he peeked over his shoulder, but every time he did he discovered he was still being followed.

“Damn it,” he said outloud. He came to a cross street and discovered it was completely congested with a goddamned parade. People were lining the street thickly, shoulder-to-shoulder in a way that made it impossible to squeeze through. The only upside was that it would be easier to lose someone in such a crowd.

Just as Edward was about to slip away, he felt a hand fall on his good shoulder, gripping with surprising strength. 

“You are a hard kid to get a hold of,” Riza Hawkeye said in a voice that sent shivers down Edward’s spine. The way she gripped him told him there was no escaping, so he turned to face her instead. She actually offered him a smile which he returned with a grimace.

“What are you running away for, anyway,” she questioned, releasing him for now. Edward didn’t answer, and instead crossed his arms over his chest. 

“What do you want?” he asked in a voice that sounded more insolent that he had meant.

Riza frowned, but did not question the attitude. “The Colonel needs to see you. I’d say now, because he is in one of those moods.”

Edward felt his stomach turn over. The precise reason he was almost committing desertion was because he did not want to ever see Roy Mustang’s face again. Their last meeting had gone so disastrously bad that it was likely going to mar their relationship forever. A relationship based on mutual dislike, as well as mutual begrudging respect: that was one he was willing to have. A relationship based on an admittance of unrequited sexual desire: that was something he had hoped to hide under the carpet forever.

Edward considered running again. He eyed the gun in Riza Hawkeye’s holster and wondered how quickly she could draw. He actually considered matching himself against Riza’s shooting skills in order to avoid the situation, but in the end he knew that his death would never be forgiven by his brother.

\-----------------------------

Edward Elric was looking more defiant and angry than Roy had ever seen him, which was saying a lot. Defiance and anger was how the Colonel tended to describe the Fullmetal Alchemist to anyone who would listen. Now he stood in front of the closed door, a little ball of rage and embarrassment. He had his arms tightly crossed over his chest, his shoulder slumped and a look of utmost fury on his face. His face was also, Roy noted, flushed red.

“Come sit down, Fullmetal,” the Colonel sighed from where he sat behind his own desk. “I will stop acting like a child if you do.”

Edward did not look up, but, jerkily, uncrossed his arms and made his way to the couch. He sat down so quickly the pillows made a pumf! sound that broke the uncomfortable, heavy silence.

Roy was thinking again. He was trying to think of the best way to proceed without causing any further damage or embarrassment for either party. He watched the younger man, how he stared at his balled fists with his clear, golden eyes. He would need to go slow, explaining the situation and attempting to get Edward to agree to the plan.

Or, he could just take that slender body on that very couch.

Roy cleared his throat, hoping that would clear his mind. “Here’s the plan,” he said, trying to put on his best Colonel voice. “We can do something about your problem here and now. We get you sorted out and this time tomorrow you will be helping the relief effort on the South Side. With your alchemy.” This garnered a sharp look from Edward. He looked confused, then his face fell and he looked embarrassed and even a little frightened. 

“I--” Roy started, and found his voice catching. He cleared his throat again and barreled on. “I am not going to do anything against your will. This will be consensual and completely professional, as much as it can be. This is a necessary evil in order to restore you to working condition. Is that clear?”

“Wha…” Edward breathed. It was the first thing he had said since he was led into the office by Lieutenant Hawkeye. Ed’s eyes were huge, not out of fright but out of utter astonishment. Roy had certainly caught him off guard, and that hadn’t been his intention. 

Roy stood up and came out from behind his desk. When he approached the couch opposite of Edward the other shifted uncomfortably in his seat, leaning away from his superior. He looked like a deer in the headlights, completely blindsided. Roy wondered if he should be more or less aggressive now. Impulses were starting to rise to the surface of his skin and he ignored them as best as possible. A file that had been carefully stowed away was being opened and he was trying not to read what it said.

The truth was there was something in the Fullmetal’s look now-- innocent and abashed-- that was making Roy’s thoughts run wild. He was flushed from his neck to his ears, the colour playing on his cheeks making his eyes seem all the brighter. He lips were slightly parted and his breathing faster. 

Roy wanted to move now, leaping on Edward like a tiger on his prey. But no, he needed this to be as professional as possible.

“Do you consent?” he asked, as if he was talking to a soldier. This was just a routine evaluation between two members of the military. 

“C-consent?” stammered Edward, still refusing to treat this as a simple medical solution.

Roy sighed and leaned onto his knees, as close to the younger man as the couches would allow. “Can I make you come?”

At first he wondered if Edward had fainted. His eyes went out of focus and his breath all but stopped. Then he seemed to flush an even deeper shade of red and, finally, he nodded quickly.

Roy got to his knees in front of the younger man, playing out the mentally rehearsed scene he had planned. He carefully removed his gloves and put them aside. Then he reached for Edward’s shirt, lifting with one hand and sliding the other hand along his stomach. There was a sharp intake of breath and a quick movement of arms that made Roy wonder if Edward was going to strike him. When he looked up to Ed’s face, however, he saw one hand loosely covering his mouth.

With no resistance met, Roy continued. He ran his knuckles along the top of Edwards pants, feeling the soft blonde hair that led to his pubic region. Slowly he undid the buckle there, then the pant button and zipper. Edward’s breath was coming fast, but he made no other movements or sounds. When Roy started to pull down the younger man’s pants, he was surprised to find he was already erect. When his boxers were pulled down enough his penis emerged with a bounce.

When Roy started to run his hand up and down the length of Edward’s member, the moaning started. It was muffled by a hand, desperate not to be heard but unable to stop the sound altogether. The Colonel looked to the face again, caught in a moment of pleasure, eye closed and mouth covered in a hand. The sight was too much, and Roy felt a stir in his own pants. He wet his lips and continued to stroke the penis, picking up speed as he felt necessary. 

By the time the moans were coming fast and steady Roy was rock hard and he fought his impulses as hard as he could. Edward was going to come soon, and he needed to be ready for the finale. Unfortunately, he neglected to plan for the inevitable mess that was soon to follow. Edwards hips were shifting under Roy’s hands, as if he was trying to escape but couldn’t control his own movements. He dropped his hands to clutch the edges of the couch, allowing the moans to echo through the room.

Panicked by the sudden sound that would no doubt be heard from the hall, Roy’s free hand shot up to Edward’s mouth, muffling him again. Then, thinking fast, he lowered his mouth to take the young man’s erection in his mouth. 

The results were almost instantaneous. Edward arched his back as hot semen spilled into his superior’s mouth. Roy swallowed, trying not to gag on the salty-bitter taste that he would need to wash down later with hard liquor. When no more came, he pulled his mouth away and used his hand to wipe away the saliva that had dripped down his chin. Finally, he removed his hand from Edward’s mouth and sat back on the couch with a deep breath.

Roy watched the younger man for a moment while the latter recovered. He was flushed from ear to ear, chest heaving and head back. Then his body relaxed and he released the white-knuckled grip he had on the couch. Ed looked at Roy suddenly, his face serene and tired, and yet there was something else there. Something like gratitude or happiness or warmth. Whatever it was, it made Roy feel strange enough to suddenly stand up and walk back to his desk.

“Now that that is over with,” he said, pulling his gloves back on with dignity. “You can take the rest of the day. But I will need you and your brother to report in first thing tomorrow. I have a job for you.” Colonel Roy Mustang was looking down at his calendar, and made a quick note on the box marked for tomorrow. He heard a shuffling of clothing and the sound of Edward Elric standing up. He didn’t leave right away, though, and instead stood looking at the Colonel at his desk for what felt like a long time. 

Roy did not look up once, and instead made himself very busy. He knew that if he met the younger man’s gaze the moment would be solidified in time, like a picture was taken with his golden eyes. Roy was afraid, too, of that strange feeling that he had growing in from the bottom of his stomach. He had to concentrate on suppressing it and it was hard to do with Edward just standing there. 

Please go. He thought desperately. As if Ed had heard his thoughts, the young man turned on the spot and all but stormed out of the room. No, he wanted to end the moment, too. Roy looked at the door that Edward had slammed on his way out. He had to believe that Edward hated him. He had to believe that this was finally over.


	9. Hard Liquor

As a state alchemist, Edward Elric was used to getting pretty much whatever he wanted. His locket served as money, a bargaining chip and a badge to flaunt in front of wrong-doers. If anyone ever said ‘no’ he could threaten, coerce, bargain or bluff his way into a ‘yes’. 

This is why, at the age of 17, Edward was able to sit at the bar of a poorly lit company house and drink a liquor stronger than he had ever had before. The bartender eyed him as he drank it, still frustrated that he had been threatened into breaking not only the law, but his own code of ethics. He strongly believed children shouldn’t drink, especially those who looked as young as Edward. Granted, he had eyeballed the young man as only 12 or 13, which had garnered him a tongue-lashing and a dangerous show of alchemy from the young man.

Ed all but ignored the bartender and instead focused on his drink. He couldn’t remember what it was-- in fact, to order it he had just pointed randomly to a bottle on the shelf-- but it burned when it went down and left his stomach feeling even more uneasy than it had been when he entered the establishment. It was taking a lot of concentration to not just throw it up again.

At least it was keeping his mind from wandering. When he thought about yesterday it was like his heart was being squeezed and it found it hard to breathe. In turn, he would feel angry at himself for feeling that way at all. He tried to feel angry at Colonel Mustang, who had grossly overstepped his authority, but when he pictured that face he just felt confused. It was like someone dumped a cup of hate in with a cup of lust and mixed it until it made a cloud brown mixture that no one wanted to be filled with. The worst part was that Ed finally seemed to have a handle on the whole lust part. In the very least, he had come to terms with it. He was lusting after Roy Mustang, and coming into the man’s mouth had not done anything to help that situation. If anything, it solidified the feeling so that he couldn’t even look at a picture of him without getting hard again.

It was the hate part of the feeling that he was having trouble with. After he had come, Ed expected to find himself filling up with the familiar dislike for his Colonel. He wanted to hate him so badly that he repeated the phrase to himself all night: “I hate Roy Mustang.” When that didn’t work, he skipped out on his morning meeting with Mustang, as if being defiant would remind him of the relationship they once had. In the end he couldn’t go back, and not because he was angry. 

So what did Edward feel? He wanted something. There was an empty part of him and it needed to be filled. Was it lust? Was it hunger? Was it loneliness? First he tried to fill it with food, but he found himself feeling ill after a few bites of meat. Now he was trying to fill the hole with liquor, because at least if it didn’t fix him, it would make him forget.

He chose a bar in the poorer part of Central. He chose it for its distance from the headquarters and the unlikelihood that his brother would come looking for him. There was also the fact that the bartender was less likely to gripe on about serving a minor. Of course, he had anyway.

It was a questionable establishment. The windows had been darkened artificially to hide the goings-on inside. The tables and chairs looked like they hadn’t been ever cleaned properly and when they thought no-one was looking, small mice would scurry across the uneven wood floorboards. The people here looked like those who never left, drinking at all hours of the day and passing out in the booths at night. And there were women, not very good looking but with generous breasts that they displayed easily. They hung around anyone new, showing fake smiles and making suggestive movements.

Everyone ignored Edward, who was too young for business and not likely to have any money anyway. The bar flies made almost no note of him and focused on their drinks. Only the bar tender glared at him occasionally, while doing make-work behind the bar. Ed had shed his token red coat at home, instead donning a leather jacket that (embarrassingly) used to belong to Winry. It wasn’t much of a disguise, but it was better than nothing.

It worked better than he hoped. In his bright red coat, nobody messed with Edward Elric. Along with his giant metal brother, he was formidable and intimidating. Here, alone, with his drab brown jacket and black slacks, he was just some kid. And he was easy prey.

“Aren’t you a little young for that?” The voice of a man made Ed turn, and the motion made him dizzy. He realized the glass of brown liquor had hit him faster than he thought. It was almost gone, too. The man who had spoke was not old, perhaps in his 30s with the shadow of a beard and slightly messy black hair. He was smirking and there was a familiar look in his eye.

“Fuck you,” said Ed, immediately disliking the man. The other might strike some people are good looking, with a suit that matched a slightly loose tie. But there was something underneath that layer of intentional dishevelment that made alarm bells go off in Ed’s brain. Even if he was a little drunk.

The man only laughed at Ed’s quick dismissal and moved one seat closer along the bar. “I had my first drink pretty young, too. When you are too drunk to see, you also forget that your dad beats you.” He winked, as if this statement was meant to be witty or humorous. “What are you trying to forget?”

Edward glared sideways at the man. He was very close and smelled of cologne. He looked the sort of man that the women in the bar would be all over, but they avoided him. Ed tried to make a mental note of this, but his mental capacities were becoming jumbled and weak. “None of your business,” he managed to say with a heavy tongue. 

The man hailed the bartender. “Another one for the boy,” he said with a charming smile. “And a vodka for me.” The bartender grunted, looking none too pleased with the situation, but he obliged. Edward did not protest as his glass was filled again. The brown stuff was starting to taste good.

The man talked for a long time. He described his life, his childhood and his opinions-- or, at least, he seemed to. Edward only half listened, distracted in his state by the swirling in his brain. The man, named Roger, kept cracking this charming half smile that reminded Ed of a certain smug grin that he used to hate. 

I’m drunk, he decided. There’s no way this guy actually reminds me of the Colonel.

But as evening fell, the details were becoming blurred. At some point they had moved to a more private booth, away from the bar. Roger paid for the drinks and smiled while Ed drank them. Edward couldn’t remember when the man had gotten so close to him, until they were shoulder to shoulder. A hand, too, was on Ed’s thigh-- his good thigh, so that he could feel the sensation of the hand slowly moving up and down. 

When the man kissed him, Ed wasn’t really sure what to do, since it was his first kiss and he was drunk. He just let the invading tongue push open his lips and taste him. The sensation was wet and arousing, though it didn’t make him ignore the hand that was now rubbing his crotch over his pants. Some voice inside him was telling him this was wrong and he should resist. Another voice said the opposite, because fuck it. It didn’t help that he was barely in control of his movements, and when they stood up to leave, Ed swooned badly. Roger caught him, and with a firm arm around his waist he guided him out of the bar and into the night air.

Edward wouldn’t remember the walk afterwards. He didn’t know they were headed to a nearby inn-- one that rented by the hour. He wouldn’t remember going into one of the rooms and being placed almost gently on one of the beds. The first thing he would remember after blacking out would be vomiting on the pavement sometime later.


	10. Broken Glass

The banging on Roy Mustang’s door was loud enough to wake him. He had taken the day off early to catch up on sleep, and he had finally managed to block out his thoughts long enough to do so. It was still light out-- just barely. The street lamps were flickering on one by one outside the window of his room. It wasn’t his room, no more than any of the rooms belonged to any of the officers or other military personnel who used the residence. 

True to his nature, the room was sparse and organized. The bed was the messiest feature, with the sheets wrapped around Roy’s legs as if he had been tossing in his sleep. He reached for the lamp by the bed, which illuminated a single book, reading glasses and phone.

The banging came again, this time with a voice he recognized. “Colonel, please wake up!”

It was Alphonse Elric, his voice echoing inside that big empty suit of armor that he called a body. No wonder the banging was so loud. His voice sounded desperate, and suddenly Roy was worried. He lept from his bed to put on a shirt.

“Colonel,” Alphonse said, pulling back the fist that was about to pound again on the now-opened door. Roy looked up at the behemoth of a teenager, who somehow made a suit of armor look worried. “It’s my brother.”

Alphonse explained the situation while Roy hastily got dressed. He donned his military uniform, in case the situation needed him to be intimidating. It was unnecessary-- Roy Mustang could be intimidating even if he was nude. 

Edward had skipped going to the central command that morning. He left the house around noon and told his brother not to follow him. Of course, Alphonse had followed him anyway, keeping a fair distance as to not be noticed. Edward likely noticed him anyway and managed to lose him near the train station-- a questionable part of the city. Worried sick, Alphonse had wandered the streets for hours until he spied a familiar blonde head coming out of a door down the street. He seemed to be limp, barely held up by a man Alphonse did not recognize. They were several blocks away, and even running, Alphonse didn’t catch up and managed to lose them again. That was when he decided to go to the Colonel.

“I don’t know what is going on,” Alphonse said in a small voice as they left the Colonel’s apartment. “but you and Ed know something I don’t know. You--” He was searching for words. Roy wondered how close the younger brother was to figuring everything out. “You must know why Ed is so upset. Is he on a mission? What happened with Alstrad?”

They approached Roy’s car and before getting inside, Roy turned to the suit of armor who was Alphonse Elric. “It is not my place to tell you everything,” he said decisively. “You will have to get the truth from your brother. Beat it out of him, if necessary.” Hoping that would be enough, he got into the driver’s seat and felt the car dip as Alphonse got into the back. 

They drove in silence, talking only when Roy needed directions to where Alphonse had last seen his brother. The area was not unknown to the Colonel. Thought he tended to keep himself to the finer parts of town in his spare time, his work had brought him down these narrow roads, especially lately. 

A theory was starting to mount in the Colonel’s mind. The reckless, thoughtless Fullmetal was dealing with his pain and confusion the way so many people did-- by drinking and fucking. He hoped Edward had only indulged in the former, but the boy was cute. Long blonde hair, a young, stubborn face, a tight little body-- these were all things that would make him a target. Especially if he was already compromised. 

Roy was furious with himself again. Why was he so stupid when it came to the Fullmetal Alchemist? The first time he had sent him to Alstrad, tied with a bow, and Roy barely found him in time. Now he was about to do the same, but would he make it this time?

As before, Roy blamed the situation solely on himself. He saw it clearly now: his solution to Edward’s problems had not worked. In fact, it had made things worse. He forgot that Edward was still a teenager: with emotions fragile as a glass bird. Roy had picked up that bird, held it for a brief moment then dropped it on the ground. Edward had shattered. The pieces were being kept loosely in a bag, and it would take a steady, caring hand to put them back together again. Edward’s trip to a bar was proof of how broken he was. And now he was being taken-- but where?

When they approached the street Roy knew right away. There was a hotel near here where one of the raids had taken place. They had removed many prostitutes and slaves, but the establishment wasn’t closed down. After all, the owners had no idea what their clients did behind closed doors. Or, at least, they claimed not to.

The hotel looked like it had been there since the city was founded. Places where the paint was chipping away showed layers of colours that went back decades. There were no balconies on any of the 4 levels, and the windows were tall and curtained. The door had a little square window, under which hung a sign that said ‘VACANCY’. 

Roy got out of the car and surveyed the building. It was connected with the other buildings on the block, but it was the tallest. He wanted to rush in, guns blazing, but his better judgement won over. When Alphonse tried to get out of the car, Roy held him up.

“Please, wait here,” he said a little too firmly. Alphonse hesitated, half out of the back seat.

“Colonel, with respect, you can’t keep me from helping my brother. He is my whole family!” When the big, metal teenager used his firm voice as well, it was almost convincing.

“Alphonse Elric, when the time comes your brother will explain everything to you,” Roy said as patiently as he could. He understand the struggle the young brother was going through. Before now the two alchemist brothers had shared everything with each other-- all of their sorrows, fears and hatreds. To be left out of the loop must have been hard for Alphonse. Roy had no doubt in his mind that Edward was open up to him eventually, but he didn’t want the truth to be learned in this way. “Alphonse, I am going to have to insist. I promise I will retrieve your brother. I swear to you. Just stay in the car.”

There was a standoff, then. Roy looked into those glowing eyes that were the only indication of the soul living inside of the giant suit of armor. It was impossible to read Alphonse, but the silence meant that he was thinking. Eventually, without a word, Alphonse retreated to the back seat again, and Roy turned to the hotel.

The door opened with a creak. No bell chimed his entry, but the old woman sitting behind the front desk noted his arrival nonetheless. It was a high desk, almost at Roy’s chin, and completely empty of papers, books or tools. The only thing there was a single, black book that lay closed. As soon as the woman saw Roy, complete in his uniform and deathly glare, her eyes went wide.

“Not again!” she exclaimed, in a hushed voice. “I told them officers, there’s nothing bad going on here. We follow the laws!” She came out from behind the desk and approached the Colonel. She was short, and must have used a tall stool behind the desk. “I promise, sir.”

“Enough,” Roy’s voice came like a quick flash of lightning. “Have you seen a young man enter here. Blonde hair, maybe with an older man?”

The innkeeper narrowed her eyes and watched Roy for a breath. Revealing the information of her customers was probably against policy. If it was know that a hotel like this was not discreet, she would lose all business. Roy would have to be convincing. He took a step towards the woman, who suddenly looked like she wanted to hide behind her desk again. 

“Tell me, or I will shut this place down... If I don’t burn it to the ground first.” The words were coming out of Roy before he could check them. He could feel the anger rising in his stomach making his ear flush and his teeth bare. He snapped his fingers and a lick of flame rose above his hand, only to disappear in a swirl of smoke. The effect on the innkeeper was not lost, though. She held up a hand and hurried over to her desk, where she clamored unceremoniously onto her stool. 

“Room 211,” she said quickly, consulting her black book. She watched the Colonel with wide eyes, waiting to see if her information was what he wanted, or if she was still in trouble. To her visible relief, Roy chose to trust the information and turned towards the stairs. The moment he was in the stairwell and out of sight, he burst into a run, taking the stairs two at a time.

Room 211 was no different than the others but for the numbers painted on a rectangle of wood. It was locked, but not deadbolted, so Roy backed up as far as he could, and using all of his strength rammed the door with his right shoulder. The impact caused an explosion of pain in his arm and shoulder, but the door gave way. Roy stumbled into a dimly lit room and nearly collided with a surprised man.

“What the hell!?” the man exclaimed. He was wearing a suit, though he had lost his tie and his pants were undone. In one hand he held a bottle of whisky. The look of surprise on his face quickly turned to anger. “Get the hell out of here!”

Roy looked quickly to the bed where lay the unmistakable prone body of Edward Elric. He was still clothed, though his hair was undone and his shirt lifted to reveal a flat stomach. He was unconscious, his head laying to one side and his arms limp above his head. 

The bottle of whisky was suddenly coming at Roy’s head, but the Colonel was stone sober and a trained soldiers besides. He ducked easily and caught the man’s arm. In the next moment he tripped the clumsy drunk and pinned him to the ground. Heat flared up in front of Roy’s hand and he forced the fire near the man’s face. “Get. The. FUCK. Out. Of. Here.” It was hard to keep his voice steady by now, and the words came out with a spray of spit. 

Roy Mustang was furious. He wanted to burn this man almost as much as he had wanted to kill Alstrad. But as the man, frightened and pathetic, wriggled out of the Colonel’s grip the rage inside of Roy started to dissipate.

He turned back to Edward, who had still not moved. The young man seemed unmolested, albeit drunk. He looked even smaller than usual, all sinew and bones. When Roy collected him into his arms he felt so light, as if he really was a bag of broken glass. 

He is so young, thought Roy as he studied the sleeping face. The Elric brothers had no family, he reminded himself. They had no safety net to fall into when they messed up. They had no one to guide them when they were lost. They had nobody to love them, save each other. 

Roy gently squeezed the sleeping boy, resting his forehead on Edward’s head of blonde hair. I’m sorry, he thought. I’m sorry I didn’t give you what you wanted.

Alphonse practically lept out of the car when the Colonel emerged with the sleeping Edward. He tripped over the curb trying to get a closer look, babbling about whether he was OK. 

“Drunk,” Roy said simply. “He’ll be fine.” It was half true.

They drove back to the residence quietly. Alphonse kept an armored hand on his brother’s arm, as if not willing to let him go again. When they stopped in front of the door to the residence, Ed finally stirred, making unintelligible noises. While Alphonse struggled out of his side of the car, Roy easily slipped out and opened Ed’s door. 

“Fullmetal,” he said, not meaning to sound as firm as he did. The boy managed to look up at him, a hint of his old rebelliousness showing in his out of focus eyes. Then, without warning, Edward leaned forward and threw up, barely missing Roy’s boots. With a sigh, the Colonel gently pulled back Ed’s hair, holding it in a ponytail behind his head and out of the vomit that was still coming out of his mouth. When he was finished, Roy and Alphonse helped him out of the car and up the stairs to their room on the second floor. 

Deciding that Edward was lucid enough, Roy grabbed his shoulders and turned him so they were face-to-face. “Tell your brother everything,” he said firmly. Alphonse was the only safety net, the only guide and the only love that Edward had available. They were family, and they should be treating each other that way. “Or I will.”

Roy Mustang stood in the hallway for a long time after the door was closed. He frowned, no longer angry or frustrated, but empty. A few days ago, the Colonel had the opportunity to be a part of that family. His part would have been small, but he could have played it perfectly. He could have been the support and care that Ed was seeking, but he threw it away. He had treated Edward no better than a prostitute, using his weakness for a quick thrill before throwing the relationship away. 

He was no better than Dion Alstrad.


	11. Painkiller

Edward Elric, the Fullmetal Alchemist, was enjoying his first, real hangover. He threw up several times that night, which prompted Alphonse to leave him on a pile of blankets in the bathroom like some kind of stray dog. Once, Ed fell asleep with his arm resting on the toilet seat, but his brother, ever the watchful guardian, lay him down once again. 

By the time Ed woke up properly, the morning was half gone. He sat up and immediately felt the effects of the alcohol: his head was throbbing, his stomach rolling and his balance completely gone. He groaned and covered his eyes with his good hand. 

“Good morning,” said Alphonse in a little voice. It didn’t matter-- the sound still made Ed’s ears ring and he groaned again. Determined, Ed stood up from his nest on the bathroom floor. It took a while, but he managed to stumble into the common room and to the couch. He groaned again.

“I am not going to put liquor on my list,” Alphonse reflected, and somehow Ed found it in him to laugh. He regretted it instantly and went back to groaning.

Needless to say, Ed felt terrible, but it was more than just the hangover. The memories he still had of last night made him cringe: getting too close to some stranger, waking up in the back seat of Colonel Roy Mustang and, even better, nearly throwing up on the Colonel’s shoes. Ed had made a complete fool of himself, again. He wondered if his stock with the Colonel could drop any lower.

“Brother,” said Alphonse, breaking Edward’s chain of thought. He had left and come back with a glass of water, which Ed took gratefully. He drank it in one gulp and lay down on the couch. But Alphonse wasn’t done and he loomed over his brother apprehensively. “Tell me what has been happening to you.” The tone of his voice told Ed that wasn’t a request or a plea: it was a demand.

Ed put his automail hand on his face. It felt cool and refreshing, but it didn’t take away the headache that beat in his brain. “OK,” he replied simply. Al sat on the big chair-- the only one that fit him nicely-- and watched his brother without saying a word. Somehow he knew this would take a while.

Edward told the whole story, starting from when they got separated trying to arrest Alstrad. He wanted to omit certain details, but he was too tired and by the time it came to those parts he was too deep in the story to hold anything back. Alphonse had predictable reactions, from astonishment, to pity, to anger and the, eventually, to understanding. When Ed explained his problem with the Colonel, Al was annoyingly nonplussed.

“I guessed that one,” he said, as if proud of himself. “You talk in your sleep. Especially… those kinds of dreams.” Alphonse made an embarrassed noise and looked away with a loud clang. Ed found a pillow and covered his face with it. He wasn’t groaning anymore-- he was full-out whimpering in embarrassment. As close as Ed was with his brother, he never imagined sharing this sort of intimate knowledge with him. The worst thing was Al wouldn’t be able to share any of his own secrets. His physical desires would have been snatched away along with his body. That left Ed alone with his shame, unable to commiserate with a fellow teenager. 

“I’m guessing that isn’t the end of the story,” Alphonse said gingerly, trying to draw his brother out from under the pillow. “Something happened. Something that made you not want to see the Colonel again.”

Edward peeked over the top of the pillow, watching the ceiling fan that was spinning lazily. It made him dizzy, so he closed his eyes. The next part was going to be the hardest to admit, but there was no stopping now. Alphonse was the only person he could or would ever be able to confide in. So far his younger brother had been understanding and showed no shame towards Ed. 

Edward took a deep breath. “We did stuff,” he said lamely, his mouth still muffled by the pillow. He could feel his face getting hot. “Like, intimate stuff.” 

“What!?” Alphonse exclaimed, nearly jumping out of his seat. “That’s--- that’s not,” Ed could tell he was struggling not to say ‘appropriate’ or even ‘legal’. “That’s not like the Colonel at all. Overstepping-- I mean, he’s your superior officer!” Al sat back then, putting his metal hands on his head. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to outburst. It’s just… surprising.”

Edward should have been relieved to hear his own misgiving spoken outloud, but instead they just made him feel ill. He wanted to agree with his brother, but he just frowned. “He was trying to help me,” he finally admitted. “I was distracted from my work and-- he thought-- I thought it was going to help. Like… like unblocking a river or whatever. Releasing tension.” He hugged the pillow under his chin now and continued his observation of the ceiling fan. 

“Did it work?” Alphonse asked, his voice a little calmer now. Ed didn’t reply right away. A fly had flew across the ceiling and was caught in the gentle push and pull of the fan. Ed hadn’t tried to use his alchemy seriously since his run-in with the Colonel in his office yesterday. Finally he shrugged in response.

“What’s wrong, brother?” Alphonse asked then, the gentleness back in his voice. It was too much for Edward. He felt his chest tighten and suddenly he was choking back tears. He tried to turn away from his brother, letting the salty drips slid to the couch pillows. Al made a little surprised noise and his armor grunted like he had moved suddenly. “Brother…”

Ed slid the pillow back over his face, hiding his tears and muffling a few, pathetic sobs. He was so tired, so miserable-- that there was nothing to do now but cry. He felt the last few weeks bubbling up his throat and pouring out of his eyes. Alphonse was beside the couch, legs crossed awkwardly and a heavy hand on Ed’s shoulder. He didn’t say anything, because what could be said?

Eventually Al withdrew to the kitchenette, where he put some bread in the oven to toast and put some ice in the water. When he came back with the meager meal, Edward was calm-- tear-stained and tired-- but calm. He was watching the ceiling fan again.

“The Colonel was very worried about you,” Alphonse eventually said. The very phrase made Ed’s breath stop. He wasn’t sure if it was what he wanted to hear, or exactly what he didn’t want to hear. Al went on anyway. “He was furious. At first I thought he was angry with you, but when he brought you out he was holding you, like… like you were important. Like you were a beloved pet that he had lost on the streets.” Any other day, such a comparison would have ticked Edward off, but he knew Al was explaining in the way he knew how. His younger brother did love animals, after all.

“And then I nearly puked on him,” Edward said, trying to bring some of the roughness back in his voice. Alphonse actually laughed at this, a little, careful laugh. 

The knock on the door made them both fall out of their seats and nearly have heart attacks. Edward could hear his heart thumping in his ears. Alphonse was the first one to recover from the shock and went to the door.

“Wait!” Ed whispered desperately. He got to his feet quicker than he thought he could with a hangover this bad and bolted to the bedroom. As soon as he was inside with the door shut, he heard Alphonse open the door noisily. 

“C-Colonel,” Alphonse said. He was never good at pretending to be nonchalant and Edward winced from where he stood listening at the door. He prayed that Al had the sense to send Roy Mustang away, but he did something very different all together.

“Colonel,” said the younger brother again with a suddenly very serious voice. There was a silence and Ed was desperate to know what was passing between the two. “I want to trust you.” 

“Me too,” came Roy Mustang’s voice and Ed felt his stomach turn over. He felt a little sick-- and a little giddy. 

“If you hurt my brother, I will not forgive you. I don’t care about military rank, or that you are a world-class alchemist, or what your intentions are. You better be here to make this right.” There was a pregnant pause where Ed was holding his breath. “I am nothing without my brother. He is everything. If he is broken, you have to fix him.”

“I-I want to,” said the Colonel, and Ed was surprised to hear the slight stammer in his voice. Was he acting for Alphonse’s sake? “I am trying to fix this. That’s why I am here. I want to fix him.”

“He’s in the bedroom.”

Edward, forgetting his hangover and his embarrassment, flung the door open with a crash that suggested it had broken off it’s hinges. “Al you traitor!” he roared. “I don’t want to see this asshole for a million years! Some brother you are!”

Alphonse looked surprised and crestfallen, but Roy Mustang actually smiled. He was wearing street clothing, a white button up shirt and plain black slacks. He was holding the leather jacket that Winry had passed to Edward over one arm. In the other hand, he was holding a pharmaceutical bottle. “You’re looking lively,” he said in an annoyingly coy tone.

“You look like SHIT,” Ed snapped back, even though he was lying. Roy Mustang looked fantastic.

Never letting his grin fade, Roy tossed the bottle to Ed, which turned out to be pain killers. “I thought you might need those. I bet this is your first real hangover.” Ed found himself frustrated that the Colonel knew his condition and only continued to glower.

But then something passed over the Colonel’s face that made his demeanor change entirely. He looked so serious, not in a stern way, but as if he was worried. He shifted the leather coat from one arm to the next, fidgeting. He looked down and took a breath. “I’m here to apologize,” he said finally.

Just as suddenly, Ed felt the air go still. He was holding his breath, listening so intently that he somehow forgot his headache for a moment. His cheeks felt warm, too.

“Sometimes I forget the situation you and Alphonse are in,” the Colonel went on. “You are so mature when there is a problem that I forget that you might need someone to…” He paused and looked awkward. He shifted the coat again and looked back at Al. “Any chance at a cup of coffee or something?” He ruffled a hand through his hair and put the coat on the back of the couch. 

Al jumped to attention, bustling back to the kitchen to arrange something to eat or drink, talking all the while in the way he often did when he was nervous. 

Ed didn’t move at all. The Colonel was not acting normally. He kept moving and running a hand through his hair, making it stick up in random places. It was as if he was nervous-- he, Colonel Roy Mustang, who was afraid of nothing. “What were you going to say?” Ed asked bluntly, forcing the Colonel to stop pacing. Ed took a shaky step towards his superior, his eyes intent on the man’s face. 

Roy Mustang met the gaze with dark eyes. His eyebrows were knit with worry and he was taking deep breaths, as if preparing to speak and then stopping himself. 

Ed took another step forward and then crossed his arms over his chest. “Well?”

“You need someone to love you,” the Colonel finally said in a low voice. 

There was a crash in the kitchen that suggested that Alphonse had dropped the kettle on the ground and he let out a wail of dismay. “And we’re out of coffee grinds!”

“Nevermind,” said the Colonel quickly. He turned away from Edward and made his way to the door. “I just remembered I was going to meet someone for coffee anyway.”

“Wait!” said Ed instinctively, which made him flush again. Roy turned back to him for a moment which was only followed by silence. It felt like Ed’s heart was in his ears, the pounding was so loud. He wanted to say something to make the Colonel stay, but he was at a loss. Eventually Ed forced himself to say “Thanks.”

The smile that the Colonel replied with was genuine and warm. Ed stood looking at the door for a long time after he left.


	12. Admission

Roy also sat in his car for a long time after leaving the dorms where the Elric brothers lived. It was a fine day outside and the sun was coming in the windows and warming up the interior of the vehicle. It didn’t help that Roy’s face was also very warm, from his ears right down to his neck. 

He wasn’t sure if he felt embarrassed or giddy from his last exchange with Edward. If he hadn’t of fled like a coward, he might have stayed long enough to hear what the younger alchemist was thinking. But no, Edward was tired and hungover and probably too emotional to deal with his feelings. It was enough that he had called out to Roy to wait before leaving. His tone hadn’t been angry-- he had been desperate. He wanted Roy to stay.

The Colonel let the pleasure of this knowledge roll over him unhindered. Whatever his relationship with Edward, it felt good that he was wanted for any reason. Maybe Edward just needed someone to talk to for advice, or to be a friend, or to take shelter with. 

Maybe he needed a lover.

Roy knew it was impossible. Edward Elric was too young, his inferior in rank and a male, though the latter didn’t bother the Colonel at all. In fact, it was making the fantasy run even more wild. Sitting in the car in the brilliant sunlight, Roy closed his eyes and remembered Edward’s pleasure-filled face while he was being jerked off. Even if nothing ever happened, he had that memory forever. 

More important now was Edward’s wellbeing. If he needed a father figure, Roy could be that. If he wanted advice about sex, Roy would supply that too. If he just needed someone to talk to, well, that was easy.

And if Edward never wanted anything to do with Roy Mustang again, then that was just how it would be. He would transfer the two alchemists to another city, under another commanding officer. In fact, this option seemed the most likely of all the outcomes. Realizing this, Roy sat up in the seat of his car and frowned. 

He was still frowning the next day when he entered his office. 

“Now what?” asked Riza as she handed the morning reports to the Colonel. She could read him like the headline of the newspaper. 

Roy sighed heavily and sat down like a man who hadn’t slept in days. “The Elrics,” he offered in explanation. It was not nearly the first time he had used that name in explanation. They had caused him a lifetime of trouble. This answer seemed to be enough for Hawkeye, because she smirked and left the office.

Roy tried to read the reports at his desk, but spent much more time practising what he would say when the Elrics walked in and told him they wanted to leave the city. Worse case scenario, they would want to quit outright-- something that didn’t happen with state alchemists and would result in a shouting match. Best case scenario, they left quietly and happily to work under someone else in West City, where he knew the militia needed help. Both options were making Roy frown.

When by noon the Elrics hadn’t yet shown themselves, Roy began to worry. Even if they weren’t resigning, they were due to come back to work whenever they were fit to do so. Did this mean something was wrong with Edward? Was he in trouble again? 

The Colonel stood up from his work suddenly, his heart pounding. He should at least go check at the dorm and make sure everything was alright. He swept across the room in a few long strides and pulled the door open so suddenly that the person on the other side nearly toppled into the room.

Edward Elric looked surprised with a touch of indignation. He hair was carefully pulled back into his usual braid, his coat was on and his face wore a usual scowl. “I know, I’m late,” he said sullenly. 

Roy opened his mouth to talk, but his carefully rehearsed words seemed to ooze out of his ears, which were warm. He tried to straighten and look dignified, but Ed just pushed past him into the room.

“Where’s… your brother?” Roy began slowly as he closed the door after the younger alchemist. 

Ed scowled. “Don’t you remember? He had work to do by the harbor. You set him up with that job weeks ago.” His hands were in his pockets and he was slightly hunched over. Was it possible he was still hungover after all?

“Right,” Roy said quickly, crossing the room towards his desk. He was caught however, by a metal hand gripping his sleeve. He stopped immediately and looked to Ed’s face for an explanation.

Edward was blushing visibly and studying the floor. He dropped his hand from the Colonel and instead it rubbed the back of his neck. “I have something to tell you.” He said so quiet that Roy had to step closer to hear him properly.

Ed raised his gaze to his superior. His eyes were glassy and his face red. Suddenly Roy wanted to look away in embarrassment but he was locked in that gaze. 

“Sometimes you are… really annoying,” Ed began slowly, as if the words were hard to get out. All the while he did not drop his look. “And we don’t agree. I’m impatient and you have a temper. Vice versa, or… or whatever.” He paused to wet his lips, a gesture that made Roy’s breath catch in his throat. “But you are a good person. A g-good man. I want to… Work for you. Do whatever you need me to do. Because…” Ed took in a deep breath and suddenly looked terrified. His eyes went wide and he seemed to be fighting an urge to run away.

“Edward,” Roy said now in a low tone. “Don’t say anything you will regret later. It’s not too late. Maybe you haven’t thought this through…”

“Stop it!” Ed suddenly burst. “Of COURSE I have thought this through. I have been thinking of literally only this for weeks now! I have denied it and tried to find reasons against it and told myself it wasn’t true. But it always comes back and it is always true.”

Ed’s face was furious, but his eyes were glossy with tears. He scrunched up his face as if to fight them back, but that only made a few overflow down his cheeks. “Damnit,” he cursed as he wiped his face hastily with gloved hands. “This isn’t how this is supposed to go. Why can’t you just let me say it?”

Roy savoured the look of astonishment on Edward’s face when he reached out and lifted his chin to meet his gaze. He watched as the young man’s tearful face turned from pale to pink to red. “Say it then,” Roy said gently.

Ed choked on a sob that stopped him from saying anything at all. Then: “I love you.”

Roy leaned down at kissed Edward gently on the mouth. It was an innocent kiss, but he let it linger, enjoying the warmth of Ed’s lips. When he finally pulled away, hand still on the chin, Ed’s eyes were heavy lidded and his breath deep. They stayed like that for many more minutes, Roy searching the lovesick face of his junior. He was perfect: all innocence and honesty and youthful beauty. “I will strive to deserve you.” The voice sounded hoarse and thick in his throat, like someone was strangling him.

The moment was interrupted but a knock on the door and it broke the mood, making both of them move away from each other as if they had been struck by lightning. Edward hastily sat on one of the couches and Roy strode to his desk. “Yes?”

A private poked his head in the door, looking slightly frightened, and even more so when he saw Edward Elric sitting on the couch. “Sorry to interrupt, sir!” he said with a hasty solute. “Did you want lunch brought to you, or…?”

Roy waved a hand dismissively. “I will be out. Tell Riza she can leave the afternoon reports on my desk. Elric, with me. Private, you are dismissed.” He then straightened his uniform and put on his coat. “I’ll buy you lunch,” he told Edward when they were alone. “Come on.”

Edward seemed unable to say anything. He sprung to his feet and followed his Colonel obediently. They walked through the halls in this way, passing familiar officers and privates with friendly nods and salutes. Roy walked confidently and calmly, but Edward was hanging back, unwilling or unable to catch up. He did not speak until they were in the front seat of Roy’s car.

“S-so, lunch--” he began, but Roy could not let him finish. In the relative privacy of the parking lot, he was unable to hold back any longer. He covered Edward’s mouth with his own, kissing and then being kissed back. He leaned towards the passenger seat, but Edward did not relent. He suddenly grabbed the collar of the Colonel’s jacket and pulled the two closer together.

Then their mouths opened and Roy could taste Edward. He had eaten maple syrup that morning, he could tell. His hot, hungry tongue tasted sweet. One hand was bracing himself against the gear shift, but the other was free to curl around the back of Edward’s neck. They stayed locked together, kissing furiously until Roy’s hand slipped on the gear shift and he was forced to pull away.

“So,” Edward said between rather deep breaths. “Lunch?”


	13. Volcanoes and Dams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Last chapter~

The courtroom was full to bursting the morning of the sentence. A quiet murmur hung in the air as audiences filling the benches and lining the back wall waited for the judgement to begin. A table of military officials sat facing the front of the room, where an empty wooden chair waited for its occupant to arrive.

Roy Mustang did not sit at that table today, though he had many times in the past. He had been offered a position there, but he declined, knowing he was far too emotionally involved in this case to sit in judgement. He had done his work already-- the paperwork, the interviews, the raids-- all that remained was the sentence to be passed down on Dion Alstrad. 

Edward Elric was not taking part in the murmur of the courtroom. He stood stock still with his eyes on the door at the front of the room. Roy imagined he was preparing himself, determined not to act cowardly.

The reaction from the crowd was tremendous. The door opened at Alstrad, chained at the arms and feet and wearing plain white prison pajamas, was shuffled in with two guards. Everyone was on their feet save the military council, jeering and shouting at the old man. Extra soldiers had been posted in the room, and they tried in vain to calm the crowd. One woman attempted to throw something at Alstrad and was escorted out of the room. After a moment Brigadier General Sandson stood up, and with his loud booming voice, commanded quiet from the crowd. Dion Alstrad was sat down on the chair and the sentencing commenced.

Roy chanced another look at Edward and saw his mouth clamped shut. His jaw was working slowly and his hands were balled at the sides of his body. Slowly, Roy took hold of a hand-- his real hand-- and gave it a small squeeze. Without looking over, Ed’s face seemed to relax.

The sentencing was a lot of reading and a lot of listed names. These were the names of those who consented to be made public for the sake of the hearing. Then there was the counts of crimes: 8 counts of rape, 15 counts of sexual abuse, 51 counts of physical abuse, 89 counts of practising immoral alchemy, 102 counts of abduction, 2 counts of murder. 

Roy had seen the numbers on paper, but it made his stomach turn to hear it said out loud. The crowd agreed, as they gasped and cried out in shocked horror. Someone nearby was weeping loudly. Someone else tried to throw something at Alstrad.

All the while the old man sat silently. He didn’t move or react or even flinch when a rock sailed past his ear. He was a finished man, and he would probably be dead before the year was out. This elicited no pity from Roy Mustang.

The crowd in front of himself and the Fullmetal shifted, and someone moved away to give them a clear view of the seated man. Somehow, from across the room, Alstrad made eye contact with someone and smiled. Roy looked quickly down at Edward and knew who he was looking at. The Fullmetal’s eyes grew wide and the hand he was holding began to quiver.

“Edward, look at me,” Roy said quietly, and for emphasis he put his hands on either side of the Fullmetal’s face. The young man’s look of panic was complete, and Roy felt his heart squeeze at the sight of it. “It’s over,” he said, as much to himself as to Edward. “He’s gone forever.” He held the gaze for as long as Ed allowed it, willing his support to flow into the younger alchemist. They remained so until the sounds of movement told them that the sentencing was over, and that Alstrad was being led out of the room. 

Alphonse waited for them outside the courthouse. He hadn’t wanted to draw attention inside, and stood like a sentinel by the car that the Colonel had parked there. He asked no questions and simply exchanged a warm look with his brother before they all piled in to go home. A quiet rain started to fall on the windshield, filling the silence with a soft patter. 

\-----------------------------

Dion Alstrad lived 5 more months in confinement before he was killed by another inmate during a riot. The prostitution rings in the other cities were broken up after a 6 week long sting, resulting in several more arrests. Alstrad’s research was burned and within the year, a law was passed making it illegal to manipulate hormones in mammals. Plants, however, were fair game.

“What is it now?” asked Lania Fitzgibbons, when she found Colonel Roy Mustang at her door one late evening. She wearing a fully floral housecoat and had her hair in rollers. It was freshly died a rosy red. 

“I have a… problem,” admitted the Colonel with as much dignity as he could muster. “It’s about hormones.”

“Oh lord,” sighed Lania, ushering the Colonel inside. “Is this about that young colt you have tucked under your desk?” The image was entirely inappropriate and stuck in Roy’s head like a wad of gum. 

“He’s not under my desk,” he said with annoyance. “Or in my bed. Or anywhere else he shouldn’t be. He’s too young.” He followed Lania into her sitting room with shoulder’s slumped. “I’m… I’m waiting.”

Lania sat heavily in an armchair that had an opposite coloured floral pattern than her housecoat and lit a cigarette. She looked like an overgrown greenhouse. “And he’s tired of waiting, right?”

Roy sighed and sat down on the couch, yellowed with years of tobacco smoke. “It’s like trying to put a cap on an erupting volcano.”

“And you?”

“Like a dam after rainfall,” he admitted. “His birthday is in a few months. We just need to wait it out until then.” 

“And what the hell do you expect me to do?” Lania had the look of being quite done with all of this nonsense. She stubbed her cigarette butt out into an overused ash tray and glared at the Colonel. 

Roy leaned back on the musty couch and looked at the ceiling. The white paint was peeling in places. “Nothing. It’s my problem. I just wanted to talk.”

“Lord above,” Lania said with a huff as she stood up. “I am full up to here with you two moaning about each other. Go bother someone else about your shitty love life. Or better yet, talk to each other! You want to know what I told Ed not three days ago?”

“Three days ago…?”

“I told him to go chop off his dick if it's such a burden. I swear, you young men! This is why I never had children!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You'll have to imagine the rest with my favourite headcannon: Ed likes to be tied up. Enjoy~


End file.
